Thursday, October 29, 2015

Me + Quinoa = sad panda

This morning I got up and did the Cardio recovery and Cardio Abs workouts despite my craptastic sleep last night. Since we are heading to Edmonton really early tomorrow I dodn't think there'd be time for me to do botht the Cardio Abs and Pure Cardio tomorrow morning so this way I should be good to go. We were going for the whole weekend, but J just got a great gig doing lasers at a big 2 room halloween party saturday night (and got me free admission too...bonus) so we'll be heading back home e saturday morning instead of staying all weekend and visiting my friends like I'd hoped. It's a shame, but for the best. This gig could lead to lots of other work for J in the future, so it's a good thing in the end. We will still get to go to Ikea and pick up a set of lights for J, but still...wish I could visit with them more.

Last night was fun and sucky at the same time. I had some birthday money to spend so I we headed to the mall and I picked up a nice big tea infuser travel bottle from David's tea, some new undies at La Senza and then a bat onesie costume just because...well...there was a bat onesie costume. How do you not get one of those? It has wings people! I flap my arms and I have bat wings! Yup, I'm pleased :)

We came home and I made another burger from that awesome vegetarian burger cookbook I have - walnut quinoa bean burgers with ginger and onion and lemon. They were very tasty...but an hour after eating I started getting stomach cramps and as the night progressed I ended up with serious abdominal pain and nausea for the rest of the evening right thru until about 4 am. I managed to fall asleep thankfully at one point, but I woke up a lot and just had a miserable sleep. I totally forgot that back before I was sick I had developed a sensitivity to quinoa. For some reason some people just do...apparently if you don't rinse quinoa really well it has a natural compound in it that is designed to deter things from eating it and some people can develop an intolerance to that compound and then not be able to eat it even if you rinse it well. Sometimes you can recover from it and eat it again...but it appears I am definitely NOT in that camp of lucky people. Even though I rinsed the quinoa very well before I cooked it I spent a lot of time last night feeling miserable like I haven't felt since chemotherapy. Ugh. I love quinoa but this has reaffirmed that I am definitely not able to eat it anymore. I have no desire to feel like that again if I can prevent it. Those of you with GI issues...I don't know how you do it. So, sadly, there are a few remaining delicious burgers for J to eat today...I think I might try making them with barley or some other grain and see if they still hold together. Pity...

Well I should be off - lots to do today. I'm taking tomorrow off so I need to get things done and then relax for my birthday tomorrow. It's gonna be a good one. So looking forward to it :)

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

This i how we do it

Well well.
This morning I got up and jumped back uinto the Insanity program again. The scheduled workout was the Plyometric circuit. I could do more than before. Sweated a tonne. I feel great. :)

Last night I hung out at my brothers and we had gluten free birthday cupcakes (lemon raspberry! Yum) and played cards and hung out. After I came home and put a coat of paint onto 2 bookshelves and some work around the house. I feel good about how it all went. The day off did me some good and it was nice and relaxing. I hope to get up and do my morning workout early friday before we head out to Edmonton for a play friday night, but we'll see. We have plans for things to do there and want to get to a lighting store and Ikea before we have supper with friends and get out to the Welcome to Nightvale play so I'll play it by ear. Life is more important than fitting in a workout sometimes. What you can when you can :)

Gotta run. Much to do. Have a great day!

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Sleeping in is nice

Slept in this morning. I don't do it often but I was really tired and we were up late going to the Attack on Titan movies (which were cheesy but the effects were very cool). It was raining so I bussed in to work too. Feeling a bit lazy but it's OK. I am PO'd at the rain because I was planning to rake my yard tonight and we are not ready for snow yet so I'm hoping I can get some dry weather so I can get some raking done before we head out for the weekend or I fear we'll have moldy leaves to rake in the spring. Boo. We have 5 big trees near our house so there's always a tonne of leaves...I guess that's what I get for leaving it this long. I hate raking too early or you have to do it twice. I hope there's still time before it snows to get at least some done...

I plan to work out in some way when I get home today although my brother may invite me over to their place for supper and if so then I may just be taking the day off entirely...my chest and arm feel fine now so I may go back to Insanity again tomororow. I'm finding the workouts to be repetitive...challenging but repetitive. They're so intense they're not boring at the time but still...a little variety would be nice...and I'm missing squats and more compound strength exercises. I notice that my clothes are all loose now and so I know I'm making changes in my body but I'm actually glad that this is the last week of the first month of the workouts because that means we get new workouts coming up to cycle through. Sure they'll be even harder but at least they'll be new. I'm debating doing a week of insanity an then a week of other workouts in between just to break things up and add a bit more variety...we'll see. I don't want to be a quitter so I feel determined to finish off this last week of the month and then do the recovery week and I'll see how I feel once I start the new workouts. The last thing I want to do is injure myself right before my surgery so I want to be reasonable about things...I just want to be diligent up until surgery.

 I meet with my counselor today. I have no idea what to expect. I hope we don't waste a whole session on me telling her about myself...sigh....as well, here's hopinh it's a start to something better moodwise.

It's a cold and drizzly day here. Time for some tea methinks...

Monday, October 26, 2015

What a weekend

It's a chilly morning...about -4. My right front shoulder and pectoral were sore yesterday so instead of doing insanity this morning I decided to go out for a run instead. I must say - Insanity has definitely got my cardio stamina ramped up. I could run my old route no problem - 4 times of run 8 minutes and walk 2 minutes, stopping for breaks at the weir and turning around at the Mendel gallery. As I ran the fog was rising off the river and the sun was creeping up and I couldn't believe that after all I've been through I'm right back here...out running in the dark and loving it still. I think the total run is about 4 or 4.5Km. It felt great to be out. Ran to an old Sound of Trance podcast and had a nice stretch out after. The podcast had tracks like Unprepared...that make me run and feel alive. It felt wonderful to be out again. I need ot do it more often before it gets too cold to be out. :)


This weekend was glorious as well. Friday we had a great meal out with friends at a Burmese place. We watched a few more Doctor Who episodes...getting caught up on this season. Having an AppleTV is great - we can stream our music all over the house now and we can just buy the season of Doctor Who and watch it like normal people again. I also got my flu shot and we had a great meal at J's parents place...painted pumpkins with my nieces (mine is Wonder Woman dontcha know) and ate a lot of rice pudding and drank a lot of horchata. Mmmm...
Sunday we went to the library and I went ingredient hunting so I could make some palak paneer and chapatis and we relaxed and read books and coloured the local radio station's adult colouring contest (the prize is free beer for a year - I've gotta try!). Mellow day. Much relaxing with my love. Perfect end to a weekend.

I also finished priming the wall shelf unit my Dad built ages ago - I am working to have it painted by the time he is here to do renos. I am quite embarrassed at the fact that it's taken me this long to do (he brought it here in the spring...ahem) but I need to have it finished so he can help us assemble it while he is here. The 3 bottom parts are already done and painted. I'm just working on the top bookshelf parts now. I have to get the paint shaken up and then I can get to the colour part. If I do a bit whenever I can from now on it should be done by then...I hope...because then when he comes I have to prime and paint the bathroom vanity he is building for us so I need to clear up the space to do that :)

Tonight - I am so excited - the Japanese live action film of the anime Attack on Titan is playing for one night only at the movie theatre. I really like this anime and was thinking I'd have to wait and just order the DVD off the internet...but I am happy to say have tickets for J and I for tonight for parts 1 & 2. I even finished sewing the patches onto my scout jacket yesterday (it was going to be my Attack ion Titan costume for Comic Expo but the patches didn't come in time) and plan to wear it and geek out tonight. As a side note - just FYI - sewing 4 large patches onto a leather jacket makes your fingers feel like you've been playing guitar for a week straight. Just saying.
Ah well...who cares :) Tonight's gonna be awesome :)

Also - and this is kinda big -I've taken a month off Facebook. I was spending all of my time there. WAY too much time. Bored? Go on Facebook.. Waiting for the elevator? Go on Facebook. Break at work? Go on Facebook. Something interesting happen? Take a photo and post it on Facebook. Ugh. I came to realize just how much I needed to disconnect from that. I need to reset my focus...to live in the now more. I need to be present and interact with people in the real world and stop wasting so very much time online doing essentially nothing. I have things to do. Books to read. Things to learn. I'm hoping this will reset my brain for a bit. I'm finding it almost like cutting out coffee...more of a challenge than I anticipated...which just confirms to me that it was a good idea.

I hope you all had a great weekend. I need to get to work. Have a fabulous day!

Friday, October 23, 2015

New trainers!

So bright.
So warm.
Soooo precccioussssssss......

hee hee neon...
I knew my 3 year old Asics runners were pretty worn out but I didn't realize how much until I worked out this morning in the new Asics GT-2000 I bought yesterday. Same shoes...and a whole different workout today. Noticably softer bouncing with greater stability and cushioning. I could jump higher and land softer with better alignment. Comfy. I am very pleased. The fact that this time I could buy them in the most rediculously loud colours possible with reflective patterns is a huge bonus. I'm a neon freak. Last time it was white or white or white.Much better! J thinks they're hideous hee hee...

The workout went fine today and J and I were easily able to carry our new tub into the living room where it now lives for a while until it's installed. The drain just shipped today, so we should be golden for our renos. We did some measuring and have figured out how to get the sink and faucet in our new vanity. It's all starting to come together. Stress levels are fading. This just might work!

This weekend there is much to do. Get my flu shot. Go out for supper with friends. Early birthday supper with J's family. Some sewing and yardwork. It's gonna be glorious. :)
Have a groovy day all :)


Thursday, October 22, 2015

Sploosh

My tub arrived!
The lazy delivery person just plopped it on a pallet in my backyard and refused to bring it inside. Good thing it's not raining. We have no driveway or place for them to leave it so J did well to get him to bring it to the lawn and not leave it in the back alley by the car. The 2 of us have to carry it inside when I get home. Rediculous - it's acrylic so it's not like it's heavy. Free delivery comes with all the perks it seems...sure just leave a $1000 tub wherever you like, don't worry. Sheesh.
Now we're just waiting for the special drain attachment for the tub to make it a super deep soaker tub (19" deep! he heh) and we're ready to go. This just might actually happen!! I was talking to my dad and he is still coming to do this in November, so once the drain comes all we need is to get a counter top from Rona for the vanity he is building us and some floor tiles. Shouldn't be too hard I hope. I'm hoping we have enough money left to swap out the light fixture in there too but we shall see. What was a tub replacement has turned into a super bathroom overhaul. Good...but pricey.
BUT! By this time next month after much labour and wierdness I will be able to have a bath. Squeeeee!

My dad is amazing. I cannot say how much he's helped me with the house already. We could not afford to do this without him doing all the labour - I and J will be his assistants and I can do most of the work but tubs and tub surrounds are a mystery to me. At 74 he is still able to do lots of things and with my help I'm hoping that this will go well. I don't even know how to thank him...

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Where we're going we don't need roads

I got to visit my brother last night. It was a good visit with much tea. I was so tired I was home and in bed by 9:30 though. Some days just poop me right out.  I feel much better today. Today is Back to the Future day - you know, the day Marty McFly and Doc went to in the future with the delorian? Tonight we're gathering with friends to watch the first 2 movies. It should be a hoot. I loved those films. It'll be funny to see just what we're supposed to be wearing in the future right now hee hee.

This morning was another workout -Pure Cardio and Cardio Abs again. I did the ab workout first and it was a lot better - I was able to do more because I wasn't so utterly pooped from the cardio. I feel very good now. I'm pleased to be keeping up with all of this. It's nice to make appointments with myself and keep them. Why stand yourself up - you're worth it :)

PS- in the world of science we are up to 10 flies for me and 11 for J. It's a tie. Not enough flies for statistical analysis either. What's a nerd to do?? I project years of studies to reach a conclusion...do we know how to have fun or what? :P

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Geo's fun fact science corner

Somehow we've got fruit flies again. Not sure where they came from (I suspect the bananas I picked up the other day) but I want to get rid of them before they get outta hand. J and I always have a debate about what is the best way to trap them. I go by the old school method of cider vinegar with a bit of dish soap in a glass method covered with saran wrap with holes in it. J thinks the holes are too small for them to get in and I want them smaller so they don't get out after they go in. He sneaks in and makes the holes bigger. I rant. His theory is they just need to get in there to drown, no fancy cover needed. SO...in the interests of science we've done a comparison: one glass set up with plastic wrap and one without.
classy fly traps is how we roll here at Casa Neufeldo

So far, J is leading by 1 fly. 6 in mine as of this morning. That may be most of the flies tho so we'll have to call it a tie. I figure mine caught the ninja flies and he got the dumb ones. Together we have won :).

I did my Insanity workout this morning again. It's tough, but I got it done. I was tired from being up late last night watching the election results roll in. It was a really pivotal election this time here in Canada. The country was crying out for a change. Although I'm not a big Liberal Party supporter I have to say I am so glad that the Conservative leadership of my country is over. In the last 10 years they have done more damage to Canada in so many areas...they were changing the Canada I love into something else. Slashing protection of natural habitat, scientific endeavors, breeding racism with changed immigration/terrorism laws, Bill C-51 that impinges on our chartered rights and freedoms and taking us into wars that we should have no part in...just to name a few things. I'm normally not very political but I was getting to be in the last while. I hope that things will improve with new leadership. I live in the conservative voting part of the country and unfortunately my candidate didn't get elected, but I am most proud that the voter turnout this year was the highest it's been in decades. People made their voice heard. It's reassuring to see that democracy can work for a change.

It'll also be reassuring to get back to non-political posts on my Facebook feed again too ;)

Monday, October 19, 2015

Clothing swap

Last night I went to my first clothing swap at a friend's house. I have to say - what a great idea. Everyone brings the clothes they don't wear anymore but are still in good shape (I had 2 bags full I'd been collecting) and they are laid out by category around the house. Everyone who comes takes a number and then each person gets to pick 3 items. This happens 2 or 3 times and then it's a free for all for what's left. Whatever is left after is donated to the local women's shelter. I came home with a bag of cool new stuff, got to visit with a friend of mine that I never get to see and met some new people. It was a lot of fun.

Being a social misfit the thought of being in a house with 13 women of whom I only knew 2 was a bit freaky but I was surprised again by the goodness of people. I have always gotten along better with guys than girls and am not a typical girly girl so I don't always play well with other women. I was nervous to go over but knew I should get out and have fun and wanted to see my friend Rachelle who I never get to see, so I put on my big girl sparkle panties and went over. The thing is, I still vividly remember back to being bullied and treated poorly when I was a chubby teen and that feeling and assuming people will be that way to me now always comes back and hangs out in the back of my mind when I'm off to meet new people, especially new women. I forget that I'm "normal" now (at least on the outside!). I am happy to say that everyone was nice and kind and I laughed and met new people. Everyone was suggesting clothes for others and there was no meanness. Just a fun time with a glass of wine and some nice people.

It was a good weekend. Got things done around the house and we picked up most of what we need for our bathroom reno that my dad is coming to help us with next month (Rona had a scratch sale so we saves some serious cash). The tub and sink we ordered have shipped (but not the special drain yet...gulp) and I'm hopeful they'll arrive on time (trying not to worry).We even picked up a floor rug for the living room that is super soft. I have been competing with the cats to lie on it. :) I'm also happy to report that the AppleTV works. We were able to buy the Season 9 to watch and saw the season premiere. So good. It's gonna be nice catching up and not having ot put my fingers in my ears and go "la! la! la! la! la!" whenever someone talks about the show. :) We have dragged ourselves into the technology of 5 years ago. Ooh. Ah.

This morning was the first fit test after 2 weeks of Insanity. 8 exercises for 1 minute with breaks. I really made some improvements! I don't have the numbers here with me but it was 1/4-1/3 better for all of the things except for the low jacks and plank crunches which I have already been doing regularly...although I still did a few more of those. For me the biggest change was the push-up jacks. I could do 25 on my toes!! To start I could only do 12 on my toes and then a few more on my knees. I kinda thought the fit test was a silly idea but now I get why they do it - so you can see how you're improving. Even though I struggle with keeping up on the workouts and still have to rest a fair bit on the Pure Cardio and Cardio Abs workouts I am getting stronger and faster.
Operation Uberfrau is definitely happening :)



Friday, October 16, 2015

It's good to sweat

Yesterday after work I did come home and do the cardio recovery workout and today was the cardio plyometric workout. I'm excited to say I can do more in both workouts than last time. Less rests and almost all the pushups on my toes. I could push on the cardio more and take less breaks - my knees were higher. I was dripping sweat at the end though - it actually trickled down my leg. I was given pink sweat-wrist bands at the breast cancer run and I now know what they are for! I used them today to keep the sweat out of my eyes. The kitten apparently thinks sweat is catnip. When I plopped down to rest a bit after she thrashed around in my lap purring like a nutter...cats are weird :)

Yes. I feel stronger. It's a bit sad to think I'll just get all uberfraued up and then I'll be off for a while to heal, but I met with my original breast surgeon the other day and he is so pleased with how I've recovered. He feels me being strong before the surgery is the fastest way to heal up and staying active is how I've recovered my range of motion and strength in my right arm. It's good to hear from someone I trust that I'm doing the right thing.
Plus...well physically I just feel better. Yes I'm getting up at 5:20 so I'm in bed by 10 but I really need this in my day. My pants aren't snug anymore and I'm losing my muffin top again. I'm getting muscles in my arms and shoulders. Slowly I can see changes. It's neato.

It's friday and tonight we plan to go and get an appleTV and try and hook it up without losing our minds and then maybe, just maybe, watch an episode of the new season of Doctor Who. I tend to generate a field that prevents new electronics from working in our house unless we stand on 1 foot and do carnival tricks. Wish us luck...

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Anxiety - I haz it

Last night I went to see Delhi to Dublin and it was a great show. So much positive crazy energy. Their music is so unique and so infectious - they are a great band to see live. I danced my feet off. Now I am super tired today since we got home late and so I slept in the extra hour this morning, but I plan to work out when I get home. I was pretty creaky and stiff from all the dancing so I figured it would be better to rest and do this instead. I could dance all night and not be tired though. Yes, that is what I'm doing this for - to be able to enjoy life. It was good to get out and enjoy myself for the evening. As always it was a bit awkward being social and meeting a few new people but I really tried to be more outgoing and I think I did OK.

I spent a lot of time thinking about things yesterday...maybe too much. I don't know. I realized that although I'm doing well physically and am back at work I am finding that mentally I'm really disjointed. Also I'm trying to work to plan things to reno our bathroom with my dad next month and am getting waaaaayyyyy to stressed out over it...it's annoying. Anxiety - I haz it. I need to get it done before my surgery and my Dad also has a minor surgery that month too...I worry the tub I ordered won't arrive in time and we'll just have a hole in our bathroom with no tub or anything for weeks. Ugh.
And honestly, although I need to think about a lot of things I also don't want to. I'm usually a positive person and there is so much to be excited about in the next few weeks here....but lately it's been really tricky to feel involved and excited in regular daily things. Regular exercise has helped definitely, but I still have periods where I feel quite odd indeed...detached. Like when I was grieving the loss of my mum for a better way to describe it. Regular life is, after all, the point of life but sometimes I just want to hide under the duvet and let someone else adult. Lately some of the responsibilities I have make me tense up and worry like I have not ever done before and I'm thinking something is up. Apparently tamoxifen hormone levels can f*ck with you a bit so there may be a reason...well other than the whole cancer thing. It's weird...it's not really survivor guilt...just a feeling like the floor is going to fall out from under me at any moment and I left my parachute at home. At any rate, I've decided to take advantage of my workplace's assistance program and talk to a counselor about all the feelings I have post-treatment to see if I can have help hashing things out that have been rolling around in my head. I have an appointment next week. I hope it helps. I described my life/work yesterday as onerous and it fits...but it shouldn't because it's not like I'm up against anything remotely like I was 2 years ago. Brains are fickle things...

But, I must get to my day. I hope you are all getting thru the week OK.
:)

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Sweaty

Insanity cardio plyometrics circuit this morning. I could do more than last time and even push myself in spots. It's encouraging to see progress. I am definitely sweating!
And now my breakfast calls. I've got time for oatmeal. :)
*grumbley tumbley*

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Too much turkey

There was much turkey.
And dominoes.
And laughter and wine and visiting and...
I think I ate more than I should have at thanksgiving but it was delicious. I can't eat as much as I used to tho - ugh. My off switch is a bit sticky!
BUT, I'm back at it.
Back at the Insanity.
Back at life :)
Yes, All is well!
Just popping in to say life is good and I'm being a good workerouterer.
Later taters

Friday, October 9, 2015

I feel good nah na nah nah nah na nah

I got a haircut. It seriously rocks. Funky with plum hairpainted highlights. I am most happy. Having a friend who's a wicked hairstylist is a great thing :)

This morning's workout was "Pure Cardio". It wasn't too bad. i stopped for a break when I needed it and made some of the more knee bouncy things less bouncy and got through it fine, all covered in sweat. A solid workout.
Now I'm back at work getting ready for one last day of work before I get to go visit my Dad with J and my sis and her husband for the long weekend. It's Canadian Thanksgiving this weekend so that means lots of card games, wine, pie and turkey with family. I can't wait. My brother and his wife can't come because she has pneumonia (poor thing) so it won't be crowded. I'll miss them but she has so many weird dietary needs so it will be a lot simpler just making whatever we want for meals...more relaxing.
Must dash.
Science awaits.

Whoooosh!!

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Pie for breakfast

The insanity workout for today was actually called Cardio Recovery so I figured it'd be easier. Well there wasn't cardio but there was a lot of squats and lunges and pulses and planks and butt, ab and balance work. It was just as tough as the other workouts but for different reasons. My legs and butt were on fire. Whew! I'm determined to do this and see it through as best as I can and see what kind of a change I can make in my body before surgery...it'll be a long rest up time then and a slow slow rebuild after surgery. The better shape I'm in the better I will heal. All I know is right now I feel AMAZING.

I discovered a new amazing breakfast too. I had leftover pumpkin from some muffins I made earlier and added 1/3c of it with a banana and some cottage cheese, pie spice, a bit of stevia and almond milk. It was like a pie for breakfast. Yummers.

I must dash. Much to do. Have a great day!


Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Hooray!

My surgeon called. There was a cancellation so I finally have a surgery date!
November 24th baby!
All aboard the boobie train.


This word - I do not think it means what you think it means

Insanity Day 3. Hard core stuff but good. Cardio "Recovery". I expected a milder workout because of the name...heh...no.  Just hard enough that you wonder part way through if this was a good idea but feel good at the end and know it was when you finish! All sweaty like I used to be after spin class.
I cannot keep up the pace that some of the people in the workouts do, but I did a lot more pushups not on my knees and made it through. I kept good form. Yup, I can do this.
I will likely miss a few days being away for thanksgiving, but I will try and get up to workout before we leave on saturday and then I'll only miss monday at the lake...or maybe I'll take my laptop and do it there outside if it's nice enough out. Who knows...We'll see how it is. There will be much wine and cheese up there so exercise might be a good thing. I usually need a jog when I'm up there to get out of the cabin away from all the peoples, but mu SIL who is usually the source of my stress won't be there this year, so I may just go for a nice hike instead. 2 more days until I can be at the lake for 3 days. I can't wait :)
Anyhoo...
I hope you all have a great day. I am off to labtown to do some science.

Later: OK I read the title wrong. Cardio Recovery is tomorrow. Today was Pure Cardio. That makes a hell of a lot more sense...

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Glass half full

OK...I've had time to calm down and I think I'm better able to go forward again. Walked home from work with J and we talked and ranted and hugged and as always he helped me settle in and deal with it. And so I am choosing to be positive. I'm looking for all the good things: More time for fitness - I can do the whole 2 months of insanity now. More time to enjoy the fall - I can go for my walks right until super snowy season when I have to switch to the bus. More time for me to have to help my Dad renovate our bathroom and get it done right - I can even get all the painting and tiling done and get it just right. And when the letter comes, whenever that is, I'll be ready. I'll be healthy and ready for healing. Bring it.

This morning I did the first real Insanity workout. The Plyometric Cardio Circuit one. Whew! Intense! A good warm up and then 3 minute exercise intervals of 30 seconds of different things with a 30 second break at the end of the 3 minutes for water. 3 sets of 3 minutes for one circuit followed by 7 minutes of good stretching and yoga type movements. Then 3 sets of 3 minutes for another circuit with 2 minutes of straight cardio at the end. I was sweating a tonne when I finished and I had to modify a few things (mostly frog jumps in and out for abs)...and take a few rest breaks...but I made it through, paying attention to form and pushing while still working at my own best pace. I was held back by my legs not being able to hop in and out anymore and my squeaky lungs...but I did it all I could and I feel really good about it. I can definitely do this. Plus it's the kind of workout I like where the more I do the more I'll be able to do, which I think will be very inspiring. I bet when I get back to this workout next week I'll be able to do more of the hops in and out for abs that I just couldn't finish and had to turn into big steps. All I know is right now I feel AMAZING.

This morning as I walked to work it was about -4 with the sunrise shining through a 10 foot shield of fog over the grassy path. It was stunningly beautiful and I was struck with just how happy I was right then. How things *are* OK. Great really when you put it all into perspective.

It's all gonna be fine peoples. It's all gonna be fine. :)


Monday, October 5, 2015

Again with the waiting

I am so f*cking frustrated.

I just called my surgeons office AGAIN since I was told I would receive a letter mid september telling me of my November surgery date and was told AGAIN that they actually STILL do not have a date set for me. They were on holidays for a few weeks so things are pushed back.
It gets better.
I will NOW be in December (instead of November like previously said (and October before that)) AND I can't even get any specific date range yet since they haven't been assigned their time for that month yet. I just have to wait. This is making me wish I'd just taken the October date they offered me even though it didn't fit into my life at all...at least I'd be done with it. I was just so sick of my being sick interfering with my life. I wanted to be able to travel for my birthday. I didn't expect to be penalized for it.
So AGAIN I just have to sit here and bloody wait and wait for a letter to arrive for my surgery (up to 1 month beforehand) and NOT plan my life or know what the heck is up with my holidays now either. I have been unable to plan anything substantial since August. How will my christmas be? Who knows? ARGH!
It ALSO means that the swap out surgery for this at the very end will likely now fall somewhere in the summer which I DO NOT want to have happen. This was supposed to all be done by then. So I have to either heal during my fun summer time OR keep my uncomfortable expanders in until the fall...or who knows how long I'll have to wait for THAT appointment then? It's maddening.

Fucksticks.

I know this is technically elective surgery but I hate being at the whims of others and having to just submit to whatever they say I need to do. I mean, his secretary asked if this scheduling in December was OK. Well no it isn't but what choice do I have? They made it sound like it was my fault since I turned down the october date. I'm not going to lip her off because she's just doing her job. I've been good. I did my time and all the treatments they gave me and I didn't complain. I did my time. Now all I want is my bloody breast back so I can put this all behind me and get on with things.

I just want a date set that will work for me. Is that too much to ask?

Insanity

Well the Run for the Cure was this weekend and it was a blast! Our team rocked the boobie hats and lab coats and walked the 5K in a misty cold weather day. Even tho Larry, Avin and Joyce couldn't come because they were under the weather the team had a lot of fun. Little Zoe drew names for the gift basket raffle I had put together and we went out for brunch after. And...get this...our team total for fundraising was $5471! Isn't that crazy? I am overwhelmed by the hardwork of my team mates and the generosity of our friends and families. We worked to make a difference in breast cancer research and support right here at home. My heart is full. :)
This morning I started my Insanity program. I'm gonna do it and eat well up until my surgery whenever the hell that ends up being. This month is all about health. I did the first workout which is a fit test and wrote down my scores and I'm ready for tomorrow. I'm gonna smash this out and see where it gets me.

Have a wonderful day all of you!


Friday, October 2, 2015

Thai carrot burgers

During the Fringe festival this year an aquaintance TJ Dawe stayed with us while he was performing his fringe play. He is a kindred spirit who is also a very talented performer and writer. He is also a vegetarian. While here he made us a few incredible veggie burgers from his favourite cookbook and when we raved about them he sent us a copy of the book as a thanks for letting us stay with him. Last night I made a new recipe -Thai Carrot burgers -from the book and wow...I think it is the best veggie burger I have ever had. Onions, garlic and ginger cooked with carrots and coriander, cinnamon and turmeric and held together by egg whites, peanut butter and breadcrumbs with some fresh lime juice and parsley. Amazing. It was a bit of work to make them but they are so incredibly delicious and healthy...and it makes 4 so we get them for supper tonight too. So amazing the buns needed nothing but some mayo and lettuce.
Yes. Veggie burgers can be good. So VERY good.
I am looking forward to trying the other recipes now.
Nom.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Drop it like a squat

Well day 3 of the 30 day shred is in the bag. I've been good and done it along with eating healthy and reasonably all week. So far so good. When I went on holidays I stopped working out and just didn't get back to it other than hikes and walks. To be fair I worked out a few times at the gym when I was in the states and got in 2 good mountain hikes which do count for something, but even J had noticed that I was really getting jiggly. Just walking to work isn't enough when I'm eating too much. I usually don't carry much around my middle and I am starting to get a bit of a muffin top so I decided I needed to get back to it all before things got out of hand. I have at least a month before my surgery (which I still have no date for grrrr...I hope it's not too close to christmas at this point) and am trying to get back in shape before then so I have some leeway and am very healthy for my recovery.

A friend leant me the Insanity workouts and I think I'm gonna start them on monday. They look intense but my kinda workout. I can modify as needed. I'm gonna give it a go and see what happens. I'll log my weekly opinion of the program as I do it. I've always wanted to try it and finally feel like I'm back at the point where I could do it and not die, so I figure it's a good thing for me to focus on until my surgery. I like the shred workouts but they're the same every day...which gets pretty tedious after a while.

I was finding not exercising was really doing a number on my moods...with the new hormone balance in my body exercise is really a happy booster for me so I need to remind myself to be more active when glum winter comes. I've been oversensitive lately and I need to do something to fix it...I'm hoping this will help. My husband always has trouble with the darkness of winter and I don't want to join him. I will be pretty immobile for about a month after surgery and it'll be stupid cold soon (boo winter) so I won't be able to walk everywhere like I do now...pity. I'll really miss my morning walks to work once winter comes. I plan to keep them up until it gets below about -10 C and then I'll see...if you have enough winter gear on it doesn't matter what the weather is, but getting to work all bundled up and sweaty trudging through snow drifts is not my favourite thing. We shall see.

Ah, I shouldn't be thinking about winter yet. It's still glorious fall. It's been so beautiful the last week. Oranges and reds with lots of geese and frost in the mornings. Now I get to see the sunrise on my walk to work and it's been beautiful.
But....I babble, so I must be off.
Have a great day peoples.