Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Well hello there adrenaline. How I've missed you :)

Oh lordy. What I can do. I love it. :)

Last night after work I went over to the gym and had a nice workout. Some shoulder weights, pushups, dive bombers, squat leg lifts, abs and time on the bike. I felt AMAZING afterwards. I had a gong show of a bus ride getting home (took over an hour) but got home and made an awesome healthy bento supper of sticky rice balls (heart shaped. me hee.) with some ginger pork and broccoli. YUM. By then it was pretty much time to gear up for today, make our lunches and then get to bed. Working out after work was fun but the bus schedule transition sucks horribly, making for a short evening at home. Good day though. :)

This morning I got up and came in for my spin and sculpt class. I stayed easy on the tension and watched my knee in the lunges and I think it went OK. Lucky me, there were 60 pushups as part of the workout today. Oh my arms...jello! I feel really good though. I've had breakfast and now it's time for one kick-ass day - I'm all fired up. I have to finish up a few things for the end of the month at work, but I have so much energy :) I'm hoping it carries with me.

A coworker had a great idea yesterday and I'm going to try and incorporate it - instead of getting up stupidly early every day, one way I could get more sleep is to workout some days at noon and just get up stupidly early tuesday and thursday for my spin and sculpt class (I like it a lot). Normally I'd go try out the lunchtime bootcamp class here on campus, but it's hard to get there and back and workout all in 1 hour. The beauteous thing about my new job, which I'd forgotten about, is it's more managerial, which means flextime. Which means if I came in 30 minutes early or stayed 30 minutes late I theoretically *could* work out at lunch a few days a week. There are also a lot of shorter workouts I could do at home some days that take less than 30 minutes like Zuzanna's ZWODS or some DVDs I have, so I'm going t try and mix it up a bit and see how to stay active and still get more sleep.

Any suggestions?

I leave you with an old favourite chilled song of mine. IT came up on the ipod this AM on the long dark bus ride...mades me smile :) Have a good day!

Monday, January 30, 2012

Monday already...

Today I slept in, due to a late night. J is working late, so I am going to go workout and then go home. I'm not sure if I will like it, but it will help me get some activity into my day. The counsellor I'm seeing wants me to put equal attention towards getting more sleep - to cut back workouts if need be to 3 days a week. While I balked at this initially I then began to wonder why it bothered me so much. I couldn't workout from healing up from a strain anyways until a few days ago. So...I am torn. For her it was the lack of sleep thing not the exercise thing...I want both. I am trying to figure out how to make that happen. I don't know. For now I'm going to try this mondays and do spin and sculpt and boot class...then figure out what to do to be active on the weekends. Usually I'd just go for walks and not count it as an official workout but winters here it is so easy to hibernate and do nothing...being out int he cold is no fun at all. It's challenging. I may ask her why only 3 days a week when I see her. I don't see why I couldn't sleep in 3o minutes on 2 days a week and just cut back workouts.
Then I wonder why it bothers me at all.

Hmmm.

This weekend I tried a new recipe - butternut squash and spinach curry. Very healthy and yummy. I also broke out the bread maker and made some delish whole wheat bread for us. I'm going to focus on eating healthy, especially if I will be working out less...it means I have to change my caloric intake a bit. It's all very wierd.
We shall try this moderation thing and see how getting more sleep helps. I may need to go to bed earlier if I want to get up to workout. These are all adjustments to look at.
You never know :)
If all else fails, it's only until I am done my thesis...then my schedule reboots again.
Wierd.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Feeling groovy

Yesterday was cool. I got to spend all day on a government committee helping them draft ideas for the new laws that will govern use and transport of biohazards and toxins.
Did I mention that I love my new job?
:)
I didn't workout yesterday, as I didn't come in to campus for anything. I didn't workout this AM, but it was for a good reason I think. Last night the crew of us that gather to throw great gatherings (we call ourselves Enchanted Groove, after our first big "thing") gathered. Not to plan, but to talk about what we want to do as a group. Why *we* are there and what we get out of it. At the end, over beer we all went around and talked about what we appreciated/liked about each other and how we all fit in to the group. Talk about your warm fuzziness. There were actual tears...it's a really cool thing to be a part of a group like this. We are half guys half girls, and while J and I are the oldest by a year, a few others are close to our ages and the rest are younger by about 10 years. But we all "fit" and we are all different with different skills and ideas who all love to come together for the joy of music and making other people happy.
I always give without expecting a thanks and for the joy it brings me. To hear back from people that what I do matters. That they notice?
I feel great :)
The downside of it all was we got home about midnight. Rather than spend a long meeting today struggling to be awake, I thought getting 6 whole hours of sleep would be a good thing. So I slept in, made some protein oats with a banana and came in to work ready for the day. We might go out dancing tonight...we'll play it by ear. And this weekend is thesis time. I think I'm ready for an attack...
I have another counselling session today. I'm looking forward to it. I'm hoping this will really be the year of positivity. Keeping a gratitude journal has been forcing me to appreciate different things and be more positive this week-I thought it was kind of corny to begin with but I'm seeing the benefit now.
Have a great weekend you guys :)

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Reunited and it feels so good

Well well. After a nice evening visiting with Dad and the family and a nice supper out, I crawled out of bed at the "normal" time and got in to work out again. The cats were sufficiently confused, but happy to see me back up at the proper earliest possible feeding time :) 5:20 comes very early...

I wasn't sure what to do after so long off and didn't want to backfire and hurt myself so I didn't go to bootcamp like regular wednesdays. It looked like there's a new instructor and I'm really excited to be in there next week. She had steps and the spin bikes and all kinds of things and had them yelling and counting down and really into it, all working hard...I kept looking in there wistfully, but I know I would have done some damage to myself after so long away, and my knee needs a bit of easing into things I can tell. I made up a workout that was heavy on upper body with bicep curls, tricep extensions, chest presses, shoulder raises, some ab stuff and some one legged deadlifts. I did a few squats with no weights to see how my knee would like it and it seemed to be alright, altho it got stiff after 2 sets so I stopped at that and hopped onto he bike for 25 minutes of HIIT biking and then hit the showers. Man it feels good to just be in to do something. I admit I wasn't full out hard core, but I was there, doing things and I know if I'm smart about it I can slowly ramp my way back up to where I was. The jiggle I feel will fade and I'll be back to the usual me. I have a meeting/training thing tomorrow off campus all day so I won't be in to the gym at all, so I will likely do a home workout tomorrow...perhaps my trusty old ball workout DVD or the Women of Power bellydance DVD. We shall see how it feels...so far so good :)

Tonight Dad is staying with us so I won't get a lot of thesis work done, but it should be a nice evening. I'm hoping to hole up a bit this weekend and get some solid writing done. I've put my personal life first lately, which has been glorious, but there's been not a lot of thesis work accomplished. I have another meeting with my new counscellor on friday so I'm hoping she can help me figure out a balance in my mind and go with it...i's tricky.

Hope you all have a great day. I'm off to the lab :)

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

wohoo

Today I feel...normal. No aches. My back feels OK and my knee is OK too. (Knock on wood)
Tomorrow I think I'll come in for an easy workout and do some swimming thursday. I've been missing it. I admit it has been nice to come in to work early, and have time for a hot breakfast (mmm...oatmeal with an egg whipped in and maple syrup) but I really feel jiggly :) It will be good to sweat a bit...I feel like I'm neglecting myself.

My Dad is coming into town for some errands and we are going out for supper for his birthday next week since he is in town. It will be good to see him for a little bit...I must run. Lots to do...

Have a great day!

Monday, January 23, 2012

Hear me baby hold together

Hmmm...I was going to come in to work out this AM with my knee being back to normal, but somehow on friday night I slept wrong on *something* and my left shoulder blade has a wicked kinky lump in it...so I didn't work out today. I don't have a full range of motion and it hurts off and on. I put heat packs on it over the weekend and I'm hoping it will will work it's way out today...I'm worried I would really hurt myself if I tried to workout now. It feels a bit better today. Man...I'm falling apart! :)

Instead I slept in a bit and made up some oatmeal with an egg whipped in, with a bit of maple syrup, milk and banana and came in to work a bit early. I figure I might as well use my time well. I had a relaxing weekend. Made lots of tasty food (including some of the best pizza I have ever made, some cheese rolls and pumpkin peanut butter soup...oh man). Relaxed a lot with J and really felt like a "normal" weekend. Those have been so very very rare. It was exactly what the 2 of us needed. I feel very centred and other than the whole random shoulder thing, I'm ready for another week.

Hope you all have a great day. I'm going to hunt down a cup of coffee and get ready for a day of poking around the old chemistry pharmacy building on campus inventorying cool old machines. I love that kind of stuff...should be fun!
Cheers.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Thank goodness it's friday

Ah. Finally friday.
I've enjoyed my leisurely week of sleeping in a bit and getting up to a healthy breakfast. Coming in early to work has been nicely relaxing too. Thankfully my knee feels pretty much normal today, so by monday I can come in for a workout again. Which is good. I feel very thick around the middle. The thing I appreciate about my workouts so much is they give me more energy, but they also give me a bit of leeway as far as what I can eat on a daily basis. Without that balance I'm finding that I eat more than I should for being less active...and am not burning it off. I definitely could not keep this up long term, or I would find my horizons rapidly expanding :).

It was so cold this week that our car battery died. Spent most of yesterday getting it towed somewhere so that it can have the battery swapped out this morning. It will be nice having it back. It should be good the rest of the winter from now on. I can get around and do my thing by bus but J works out where there is pathetic bus service and it takes him over an hour to get to work by bus...not practical at all.

I am quite tired this morning for reasons I do not understand...but thankfully I just have to make it through friday and I can relax a bit. Tonight J has a a show to work so I will work some on my thesis (do I know how to rock a friday or what?) and then do some work on the weekend too. A friend of mine has invited me out for a weekend of snowshoing and it sounds lovely...but I just can't right now. I have to make an effort to try and schedule work into my life. To be present and work on things in my head bit. It will come...slowly but surely.

Must be off. I get to go rummage around the old science building on campus today...should be fun )
Later taters...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Brrr

It is another chilly day. Still on recovery week for my knee. It's not quite there yet...I'm giving it this week to be better. I may do some weights at home for my upper body the rest of the week with my 8 Lb freeweights and bands just so I stop feeling so lazy :).

I must say this extra sleep is glorious. I got 8 hours last night...can't recall the last time I did that on a weeknight. :)
Today is healthy foods and lots of thesis work.

Hope you all have a wonderful day.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Well hello winter. Where've you been?

Another day of no workouts. My knee feels almost normal. Hooray. I am hopeful that another day or 2 of rest will do the trick. I may get back to swimming at first to ease into things. All I know is I need to get at something as I seem to be plumping up a wee bit. It's only a few pounds so far...but I know me and know I need to look after it before it becomes 10. If I keep things in check I'll be OK :)
It's -46 with the windchill this morning. I dug out my ski pants to wear to the bus this MA and I'm glad I did - the bus broke down and we had to wait outside for a while for the next one. Brisk :)
Winter is usually like this but it's been so unseasonably mild up to this point (no snow christmas day!) that it takes a bit getting used to since winter arrived on the weekend. It's here tho - must adjust. Time for the mittens and goggles I think.

Must dash. Lots to do on this frozen day.
Have a good one...hope it's warmer where you are :)

Monday, January 16, 2012

Recharge complete

Had a fantastic weekend away at a West Edmonton Mall theme room. Giant jacuzzi. Wine. Cream puffs. Blacklight mini golf.
Ate far too much. Smiled so much my cheeks hurt.
MMMmmm.
Spent 2 blissful days with J reconnecting and being us. It was just what the doctor ordered. I'm a bit scared to come back to reality, but it sure was a good time away to reset things...

My knee is still a bit stiff (grrr), so today I slept in and just shovelled the foot of snow we got over the weekend as a bit of exercise for the day. With any luck I can get back to working out at some point this week. We shall see. I certainly need to work off this weekend...

For now, it's a new week. We'll see how it goes :)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Tag, you're it

OK.
Sleep goes a long way to restoring sanity.
It looks like we might be able to get away this weekend as well too.
When it rains it pours...thankfully I've found my umbrella far back int he wardrobe after much looking.

My knee hurts still, so I didn't work out today. It's definitely the old achey injury that only rest will cure, so that it what it will get. Until I can get me a robot knee, I need to be kind to it. GOing to spin on tuesday was likely a dumb thing to do. Rest is best.

Over the last few days I've come to terms with the fact that being so busy over the last few months is starting to change me, and not in a way that I like. I have found myself becoming introverted, and focused. This was necessary, yes, to get things done, but I was also pushing away J and others that love me and support me. I have done things that hurt these people closest to me, under the misguided assumption that because I was at ease with them, they would somehow understand when I did things that hurt them or made them feel rejected and less important. That it would be OK for them. This past week I knowingly (and admittedly unthinklingly) after having a long terrible day did something small, yet big, and the events that whirled after have led me to take a long look at myself.
I am going to go and meet with a counsellor to try and sort out all this craziness and try to get to know myself again. Luckily my job has an employee assistance program to help me. I am going to use it. I need to understand why I do these unkind things and not do them. How to deal with all my stresses. When push comes to shove I do not want to become the person I am beginning to become - this will stop now if I have anything to do with it. I also want to rekindle closeness and sincerity with the man I love. It is hard and I have been ignoring it under the guise of "no time for that". That is stopping.

In the midst of all this I still have a thesis to write. How and when I am not entirely sure, but my father (sweet sweet man) has offered to help me with another semester of university, so that if I must take longer to finish, that the stress and worry of the cost of it all does not loom over my head. He told me about how he ha to extend his MSc for similar reasons and understands what it's like...and doesn't want me to be so stressed out over everything. This way the money I had to pay back to the government is not looming guilt over my mind as I try and slog on with life and school and make amends. It's a daunting task that seems to be taking over my life, and I resent it for it, but yet know that it is my fault for putting myself in this situation. It's sparkly panty time.
All in all it's been a very weird week. But ultimately good in the end for all that has come out of it for me. What a week. Ugh.
It's reminded me that life does not stop for school. That after it, it is here, and IT is what is the key to all of this and not some words on a page. Somehow I have to find a balance and finish this up.

We shall see. I hope this weekend away is a time to reconnect with J. To meet him in a level place, away from home, to just be together without worries or stresses and remember just why this life we have together is so wonderful. I hope it is a good time and not stressful or difficult. We both know what we need to do, and how we feel. I have hurt him inadvertantly and I want to make a start at rebuilding his trust with me. It's a bit like playing lego blindfolded...all the parts are there...just a bit of a struggle to find the way they all fit together...just need to hook them up together again so that things are where they should be.

WIsh me luck.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

*sigh*

Well. This weekend is not going to happen.
For a myriad of reasons.
I could not sleep last night.
I am exhausted.

Yes. at the moment life is...fractured.
I am tired of it all.
Someone else can do this for a while OK?

I've had enough.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

instant injury

I woke up this morning with a very stiff, slightly sore knee. Weirdness. It almost was clicky...how this happened I have no idea, as I was fine when I went to bed. I decided to come in for spin and sculpt but kept the tension low on the bike and did not do any lunges or squats. It's still stiff, but I"m hoping it will work itself out. If it's sore tomorrow I will definitely ditch boot camp, as there are always lots of things in it to stress my knee and that would not help. J and I are going away for a romantic weekend this weekend (I can't wait!) and nothing would be less romantic than me limping about. SO I will be nice to myself and see what happens. I hate the fact that my knee can just do this. I think I tried too much too fast after a week off perhaps...a little warning would have been good to let me know to stop tho. This is all rather sudden...and usually requires me doing nothing for a few days to let it heal up. Grrr.
Some times I hate my knee.

Last night was nice though. A nice visit and chinese meal (yum) out with the family. J had to work so I ordered some kung pao chicken to take home for the 2 of us to have tonight for supper. Yum. no cooking for me. Ha HA!

And so I must be off. Work to do. and then there's that dang thesis...

Later taters.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Too many jocks spoil the...

I was up and in this AM for my Workout A + abfest + 28 minutes on the stairclimber. I was a little worried today might not happen since I woke up at 2 AM with a killer headache, but a banana and advils seemed to do the trick. Woke up as usual at 530 and felt just fine. The gym is full of loud bellowing, back slapping, grunting jocks...it's tryout times for football and volleyball. Thankfully if I get in my weights stuff first before 7 I miss most of them. They're very polite and aren't rude or ogley but it makes it so crowded. Soon they'll pare down the numbers and it won't be so bad...nothing like doing walking lunges through a crowd of linebackers. So very odd...

My Dad is home from visiting my sister in Ontario so tonight is family night. A little chinese food and hopefully a few games.
Looking forward to it.
I'm feeling rather good today. After a day of house chores and catching up on a few things like taking down the christmas tree I took in the recyclables and used my booty to go to Value Village (woo) and got some new (to me) jeans, a skirt and some nice sweaters for work. I now have a few more nice work things and only spent $40...:) Nothing like a new pair of brand name jeans that actually fit and nice hooded red button up sweater to make me feel all swanky.

Have a nice day :) I'm off to the lab...

Friday, January 6, 2012

Nausea oh nausea, rock on.

As is the usual, in January people come back to the gym and for whatever reason try to attempt feats of fitness that they are just not ready for. Exhibit A: this morning, a new guy who looked relatively healthy was pushing himself with weights and then, while on a rower, went all pale and shaky and was sick on the floor and just couldn't get back to normal. The EMTs came to take him in for a checkup just to be safe. I'm glad he's OK.
I'll never get that. With the low blood pressure I have when I feel dizzy I stop. Right there. I have to or I faint...which hurts. Unlike the movies you do not gracefully collapse on a soft object. If you're lucky someone will catch you and you won't bruise yourself. If not...well, gravity is a harsh mistress :)
Pushing yourself to the point of puking just doesn't do it for me. If you've been active for a while then you have a better feeling of what you can do and how far to push yourself...but to do something so hard you barf? I know a few people who have done so accidentally (your first spin class seems to be notorious for this sort of thing)...but why should you push yourself this hard?
Seriously. How can people convince themselves that is normal? It's not. It really isn't. It's you body telling you to back the f*** off and ease into things.

This AM felt good...I went in for workout B and 28 minutes on the elliptical. I didn't do a lot of abwork after as my abs were still painful form the 2 previous day's exercise classes - just the parts that didn't ache. Last night my abs HURT. That will teach me to take 10 days off and jump right in where I left off :)

And now...another day. Last night was a busy regular old sort of day and it reminded me (*whimper*) what "normal" life is like with school and work. How I must get back to the crazy overworking for a few more months to finish. I really REALLY don't want to...but I must. I must finish. I've caught up on most of my chores and now, there is just my thesis looming over me. It's daunting...but I have to pick away at it. Soon I will be done. Soon. Summer. *gulp* That seems so far way from now...

Thursday, January 5, 2012

SCIENCE!

I wish I could say I got a lot of thesis work done last night.
Instead I was reminded of household chemistry like a newbie first year chemist. Soaps are a base. Vinegar is an acid. So, mix the 2 and you get a sludge. Which is harder to remove than the stain I was trying to get out in the first place...whoops. :) Ah well...I got a tiny rug steamer for christmas and I'm trying to clean up all the areas our older cat has decided to...um...favour. Online hints for cleaning said mix Borax and vinegar...I had no Borax so I just used the soap that came with the steamer. Now I know better. Wash and THEN rinse with vinegar water. All is nice and clean now. Hopefully fur ball will take the hint. It's nice to have a little shampooer/cleaner for this kind of stuff, altho I am glad to have a dark carpet or I'm sure you'd really tell the dirty parts from the cleaned areas...

This AM was spin and sculpt. No dizzies today-a solid workout. There was a new guy in our class today...he seemed to have a great time and after the spin part he looked at me and went "yeah!" and gave me a high 5. It was cool. Made me smile. I love when people are into things...makes it more fun.
Must be off. Lots to do...I'm slowly remembering what the chaos is like. Time to hop in with both feet and get to it...
Have a great day!

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Apricot pecan oat muffins. OMG. Pirate Bakery strikes again!

New muffin I made up last night for a week of relatively healthy snacking...which will likely will NOT last the week...heh heh. Before I forget, here is the ingredients for the most delish concoction I've thought up lately...and not too unhealthy either:

Mix the following together and let sit 5 min:
~1/4 c diced dried apricots (I suppose you could use cranberries or *shudder* raisins if you like)
~1/4 c roughly chopped pecans
1/2 c oatmeal
1 1/4 c milk

Then stir in:
1/4 c oil (I know - not the best - but if you healthify baking too much it doesn't keep it's bakiness more than a day or so. As a former baker I refuse to eat crappy baking...you can cut it back a bit more or use melted coconut oil instead for a more healthy fat, but don't say I didn't warn you not to overhealthify)
1/3 applesauce (or 1 mashed up banana would work too I suppose)
2 eggs
1/2c brown sugar (or agave syrup or maple syrup if ya have it)
1t cardamom AND cinnamon
A few shakes of nutmeg
1 t vanilla

Stir in until JUST mixed:
2 c flour (don't go more than 1/2 whole wheat or they'll be bricks)
1 T baking powder
1/4 t salt

Bake at 350 for ~20 minutes until they bounce back when tapped on top and are starting to brown up.
How can you tell I sort of bake by ear. Years of being a baker have made me rather experimental with things like muffins. I loves me my muffins...I'm working one with espresso and sunnyboy cereal and dates...I will perfect them. It's a tasty process!

:)

Booty call

This morning I was up and in for boot camp. The regular girl called in sick and her replacement was amazing. It was different - lots of body weight movements - less tabata insanity, more variation and fluid movement. A good workout. I kind of feel bad for the other instructor - this girl really had it together. I'm hoping they ask her back for other classes...
We are all stocked up with healthy food and I'm ready for a month of healthy living. One thing that I'm realizing is just how much sweetener I eat. Call it a resolution, I'm not sure what to call it, but over the weekend I came to the realization that I am being dishonest with myself, perhaps to my great peril. Not trying to be melodramatic here -I know the health concerns regarding splenda and equal and I've decided (despite a bit of nervousness) that I need to remove them from my life. I have come to rely on them too much and I need to just eat healthy. Occasional intake is not a great concern, but I'm taking it to another level...and I'm uncomfortable with it when I'm honest with myself. Things don't need to be sweet for me to enjoy them, or I should enjoy them less. Plus there is always stevia which I don't know of any health concerns from (although it tastes weird in some things).

Thing is, a close friend of mine has a parent dying of cancer. This has reminded me that if I really am going to do as I claim and be healthy in my everyday living I can't shove chemicals into my body. Why make the effort of eating clean and organic if I'm going to shove numerous teaspoons of chemical into my body every day? Why risk dying of cancer? Why gamble on the potential loss o health and time with my loved ones? I'm not saying never have a diet drink again, but when it's slowly becoming a part of almost all I beverages I drink? Crystal light or putting sweetener in my coffee...multiple times a day? It's just plain unhealthy.
Period.
I know I need to do this. I have to be honest that I am frightened that I will suddenly gain weight back from not using it. But I know I can pay attention to how I eat and drink. I can make the necessary changes. And in the end a pound or two may be better for me than a constant dose of chemicals.
What do you think? Do you use sweeteners? If so, why or why not? I'd love to know your opinions...

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Happy New Year

Whew.
5:30 came way too early today.
I've had a lovely holiday. Pity it wasn't just a wee bit longer.
I had a nice 10 days off work. Most of that was spent putting on and tearing down an all night space themed electronic music party, but that too went well. We sold out and raised 900 for a local charity. We had an absolute BLAST and it was worth all the hard work. Then it was relaxing and laziness with family. Lots of nibbles and good wine and despite my compete inattention to food intake, I really did not do too badly. I've found the emotional attachments I have to food are not quite the same any more - which is good. Yes, some food still makes me happy because they are just plain delicious (like chilled gawerztraminer and pomegranates and cheese of any kind!) but I just can't *eat* like I used to. Eating is not in and of itself an event. I don't even know how to describe it, but it's not as important anymore. It seems this whole MSc thing has put this and other things in perspective...empty eating has lost it's appeal to me. It's not an activity that fills an emotional need for me. Now I still indulge - it's just a more concentrated enjoyed thing... and in smaller amounts. This is a good thing I think. It was so different to indulge slightly here and there and not feel guilty, knowing that it will work itself out, because I will be back at the gym and will continue to be eating healthy...because that's life now. And life is good.

This AM after a week of no official workouts (but much busyness) I came in for spin and sculpt class. I can tell it was too long of a holiday from workouts...I actually got dizzy during the sculpt part of class and had to forgo some bicep curls for just standing and breathing and not getting too dizzy...strange, but not entirely unexpected. I have a low blood pressure so if I go all out and I'm not used to it, I can faint. I know the signs and I didn't let it get to that point, but It was a reminder to me that I should really plan a few workouts over long periods off from the gym. We did get lots of walking (and dancing!) in this holiday, but nothing like the intensely focus workouts I was getting prior. I have to admit, the rest was nice, but I was missing the feeling of physical exertion by the end of the holidays. It's nice to be back into it now. I am dreading the way the gym will be overcrowded the next month or so, but that too will pass...I've never quite understood why some people need a new year to resolve to make changes, but to each their own. I have always been the sort to just do things when I'm good and ready :)

Now...time to get back to work (sigh), and it's final crunch time on my thesis. I dread it, but I am excited for it, because I know this is it - the last stretch! I will work my hardest to get it done for approval in March to decent in April. This may not happen, and I may drag it out over the summer time to preserve my sanity, but I'm giving it a good honest try. I feel refuelled again and ready to push thru. I've had time to relax with family and friends and read books for fun...and I know when I'm done this last stretch of hard work my AWESOME life is there waiting for me. I've had a little bit of it and it encourages me. :)

Further up and further in :)