A bit odd

I am torn between being a lazy sod and going hard core this last 3 weeks. Anywhere in between just feels like slacking, so I'd rather enjoy myself.

I have so much going on my life and I'd rather enjoy it...but I also don't want to feel uncomfortable in the summer and if I do my best then I should be content with whatever I am then. I am already a bit uncomfortable with my physique.
*sigh*
I just wanna work out hard core...but I can't yet. So I think hey - why not popcorn and beer?

I've gotta meet myself half way here...and I can't seem to find a balance. I eat for comfort so my relationship with food is not particularly normal...it doesn't help. Even thinking about it this much annoys me.

What's it like to be a regular person for whom food is just fuel?
For me it's deliciousness that I thoroughly enjoy. A lot.
Ah well...
I am hoping more vitamin D will help my mood.
We shall see.
At the moment it is a bit odd I must admit...