I stopped on my way home (oh how leisurely!) to get a few groceries and there was a clothing store nearby, so, on a whim, I popped in as I had a bit of free time for the first time in...well...a week. Spring stuff is coming in and I, literally, have no summer clothes. Tank tops yes but no skirts or shorts or anything like that to wear. Old stuff's all too baggy.
I tried on a few things and it messes with my head a little bit because I look completely and utterly NORMAL. Like the most normally normal person you could think of. I tried on skirts and shirts and shorts...and could choose from whatever. Lots were too BIG. As I tried on a zillion skirts and shirts (in size 6 no less) I was hit on the side of the head with the fact that I can just get whatever I like now. It comes down to if I like it or not....because it ALL FITS.
This is so weird and foreign to me. Yes, in my head I thought I knew I'm healthy and "new" shaped but seriously? I put on cotton shorts...the kind I'd be VERY uncomfortable in before...would hate from odd folds and wrinkles and not EVER want to sit in them because of how my legs would bulge out. And you know what? They look great now. My legs are not perfect, but they're good enough for me :) And get this - this is a super massive revelation the size of Godzilla - my thighs don't touch anymore. No...seriously...no rubbing when I walk. They're just...my legs. Pants and shorts fit like they're supposed to and won't bunch up when I walk! It will take me a while to realise this I think...to be completely comfortable in shorts. It also turns out I like skirts on me. I now have a few cute skirts - a lime green cord skirt and a cute denim one that both are about 3 inches above the knee...and I like them. No weird thigh thoughts...I just relax.
Now when hot weather comes I at least have a go to option. I'll have to get some shorts too. eventually...and teach myself how to be comfortable in them.
Today I wore a skirt and my boots for my speech and I loved it...I'm no longer self conscious about my legs. They are a non-issue. Which in itself is an big deal.
It's cool to realise how far I really have come...and how my brain needs to catch up with me on a few things. I've been nose to the grindstone, so I forget sometimes.
Yay me :)