At the closing of the year

I feel VERY lucky today. Blessed even.
Today after my half day of work my Dad is picking me up and he and I are going to visit an old family friend in the hospital. She has cancer...and they found it too late to do anything. She's in palliative care in the hospital and Dad wants to go and see her and say goodbye while he's here. Yvonne Brown is such a sweet woman. I work with her son and her husband also used to teach here at the university. I know them more through them being down the road at the lake where my Dad lives. They are very kind to my Dad and have us and others over for pancake breakfasts and visits all the time. Dr. Brown also keeps bees and is always giving us honey and beeswax. Mr. Brown recently retired and they were enjoying their time together until this...I guess it was not meant to be. She did some chemo to try and buy her some time, but it only did so much. They were so kind and supportive for me during my treatment. I have tried to be the same...but sometimes it makes me feel more guilty than anything else.

It's just so sad. I remember being in the hospital with Mum. Visiting...knowing that soon I'd be saying goodbye. I've been with others as they left this earth to move on and there is never a fair or easy time of it. It's both a blessing and a curse to be have time to be able to say goodbye to those we love.

I feel like my being there is almost an insult, but I want to go and say goodbye. From time to time I wonder why I seem to be OK now and others are not. Here I am complaining about pains from my reconstructive surgery when Yvonne will never get to that stage. It's gonna be strange. All I know is I'm gonna hug my Dad a lot after I think. Then J too when I get home. And my brother later too. Because I can. Tonight we are heading over to my brother's for Kline Yule and we'll be having our holidays with them tonight...ebelskivers and sausages and mulled wine and games. Family time. Even my humbug of a husband can't resist enjoying himself a little bit :)

What am I getting at? I don't know...all I know is this:

Hug your families and friends this holiday season. They are the greatest gift you'll have. Yes they're crazymaking and by the time the holiday season is over you'll be begging for quiet again, but for now, all I want to so is keep them close and remember just what goodness there is in this world. For there is so much of it. And I am here to be a part of it. And it is oh so very good. :)

Merry Christmas to all of you.

Yes YOU.

"If I cannot bring you comfort then at least I bring you hope
For nothing is more precious than the time we have and so
We all must learn from our misfortunes
Count the blessings that are real
Let the bells ring out for Christmas at the closing of the year..."