I keep reading on people's blogs about how they "warmed up for 25 or 30 minutes on the elliptical before their workout...". And it's really pissing me off.

Well, currently I can't even do just that without my left knee being annoying. That's all. No real workout to speak of. Sure lots of long walks but no endorphin pumping sweat dripping workouts. I'm slowly gaining weight...I am up 2 pounds...because I am not able to be as active as I want to. Not a big deal...yet...

Grrr...I believe it may be that I need new shoes. So I will do that. I pronate badly, and it may be making my knee go funny. It's not sore *yet* but it has that feeling like it will if I don't let off. It's starting to click. And I'm not even *doing* anything strenuous to speak of...
So no workout today (again), as it was starting to stiffen up after an hour long walk with J last night.

I hope the new shoes and the leg strengthening exercises I am doing will help.
If that doesn't work - I'll get some orthotic insoles.

If *THAT* doesn't work...well...I will resign myself to cupcakes and beer my good peeps. I'm on the edge of the "I'm tired of trying, maybe life is giving me a hint" danger path that leads off the wagon and all the way to Caketown.

I keep trying to be healthy...I really do...but I can't. I can't even do 30 minutes on lowest settings on the elliptical...even though I used to be able to run 10 K and do squats and lunges. I'm stressed out and I *need* exercise to keep me sane.

Or I turn to food.

This is really really pissing me off.

I will not give in. I promise. I've come too far to give up.

Doesn't stop me wanting to just a little though...


Charlotte said…
That seriously sucks about your knee! Can you do other less-impact stuff? Like swimming? What about kettlebells? You can get a heck of a cardio burn from swinging the 'bell around!

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